Tuesday, 19 November 2013

TEIFI IN WONDERLAND



        What a weekend. Bus sing-a-longs, jelly wrestling, pool games, press ups, shirtless Dom and EVEN some kayaking! Teifi 2013 will go down as a truly great weekend.

FRIDAY – LATE FOR A VERY IMPORTANT DATE

        The weekend began with the troops assembling at sheds on Friday afternoon to get our gear packed into the vans, which surprisingly was achieved with minimum faff! The occasional torrential downpour promised great kayaking conditions for the weekend, as well as giving everyone the first opportunity to get used to having damp clothes; this would become a theme for the next few days! We all split into our vehicles to get comfortable, with our bus getting into the mood quickly with a heavy bass version of wrecking ball getting the windows steamed up and the bus shaking in traffic…that sounded better in my head. The next few hours passed without incident, as everyone got in the mood for the party that night with multiple sing-a-longs as well as discussing what magazine Meg was going to have to buy in front of her mother at tesco (keeping traditions alive). It was at the petrol station however where we learned that Elliot had kept quiet about being the youngest member on the bus, leading to an interesting conversation with customer services about whether they had anything more hardcore than NUTS. We didn’t do any better in improving the Welsh perception of the English when Tom decided to test whether the 70cl bottle of vodka he was carrying could bounce, leading to the biggest avoidance of “spillage is lickage” I’ve ever witnessed! Everyone stocked up on food and drink for the weekend, with enough alcohol being bought to supply the Raz for a month, and with that we embarked on the final part of the journey slightly merrier.   

       We arrived at Teifi to be greeted by a madman driving a lawnmower and wagon who happily told us all to jump in to be driven to the campsite (wouldn’t want anyone getting muddy). After narrowly avoiding falling out of the trailer 3 or 4 times we arrived at our spot to find the rest of LUCC already engaging in the fun activity of setting up tents in the dark. Surprisingly, this didn’t pose as many problems as you might think, although it became apparent quickly that Tom (pronounced Jack) had brought a canvass with a pole attached to it rather than a tent!! Social Sec extraordinaire JJ jumped to the rescue of Sarah and Siriol after their tent broke within minutes of arrival.  With this done the drinks were cracked open, as Liverpool made their presence felt at Teifi with our bright and beautiful pink tshirts. Everyone’s favourite forfeit game was alive and well as one by one people claimed possession of objects, allowing us to get a close up experience of the growing mud. Once everyone had drank enough to stop feeling the cold, special mention to fresher Tom who drank enough vodka to impress a Russian soldier, we got ourselves into the marquee to join the other universities and make Liverpool’s presence known with a moshpit forming almost straight away. The braver of us ran to the pool for some water antics, although most were more sensible in knowing that it would be GOD DAMN FREEZING. Suddenly, a ripple of excitement went through the crowd, as the promised jelly wrestling got underway, with the particular highlight being Spud rugby tackling an increasingly drunk Meg. It was around this point that I helped Meg from being crushed as they rolled the paddling pool away, despite what pictures may suggest was happening… one thing’s for sure, Meg certainly did her fair share of improving inter-club relationships that night! Highlight of the night had to be the front row seat of our amazing trip sec Dom thrashing away in the pool while wind milling his shirt above his head, something not many would have thought they’d see!













SATURDAY – TEIFI IN WONDERLAND

  Despite his active role in the drinking the night before, Dom was up to get the rest of us sleepyheads out of our tents and ready to get on the river. After a quick breakfast, and with heads ringing from the night before, we set off to get the shuttle to the get-on. A quick look at the river was enough to see that the heavy rain had done its job, as the water was moving quickly and had risen above most of rocks on the river; it would also make finding eddies more difficult. We split into our difficult groups and got ready to get paddling for the first time. For Aqueel this was his first time on a river at all, but he displayed the enthusiasm we look for at LUCC and was eager to start. Despite the fast flowing water, the river didn’t pose too many problems for our groups for the most of it, other than giving Graham the unenviable job of finding eddies; this led to a lot of zig-zagging across the river as we discovered that the eddy we were heading for wasn’t an eddy. Other than a small wave to drop through the high levels of the river had washed out most of the features on the river, although we did get excitement on hearing rumours that our mighty Trip Sec had swum, although it turned out he had actually just been rescuing a member of his group.

  The first bit of carnage of the weekend happened purely by accident, as we all eddied out into what I can only describe as the eddy from hell. The size of it had lured many of the groups into it, across a very boily eddy line which claimed victims from each group, and it quickly became necessary to maintain a low brace as precaution as more and more people came crashing in and nearly binning people. Gareth in particular enjoyed this part of the river as he was called to rescue not just members of our club, but other clubs as well. After escaping out of the chaos we carried on as before, only for Graham to spot a paddler casually standing in the water by a tree. After guessing correctly that it was one of ours, we discovered a stranded Jack (Tom) on the side of the river. This led to an example of how not to rescue someone as some idiot from another university attempted to help, instead dragging Tom through more trees. It was after this point that we discovered that Dom had in fact managed to swim!

    Without much carnage we reached the get off for lunch, with everyone happy to tuck in to some food as hangovers started to kick in. Unfortunately, my hangover took a turn for the worse leading me to sit out the last bit of paddling for the day, as the last thing anyone wants to see is chunder in an eddy! The rest of the group, after a bit of faff, got back on the river to run the slalom section of the river, which nearly everyone completed without difficulty. I say nearly everyone, after Ant’s friend capsized trying to avoid knocking one of our freshers out of an eddy, failed to roll twice, Ant’s attempt to dead man rescue him leading to his own roll, before finally the friend swam! The group then decided to keep it as a short second session as the high river levels had essentially washed out the Cauldron and there was no easy way back to the campsite without going right down to Henllan.

     The torrential downpour shortly after this gave an excuse to impose LUCC nap time, with Tom finally admitting that his tent was not a tent and joining the growing contingent sleeping with Tabs. Greg’s tent joined the growing list of casualties, however stayed standing with the help of beer bottles used as tent pegs. We were roused out of our warm (albeit slightly soggy for some) sleeping bags by the news that food was being served in the marquee, and so we made our way in excited at the prospect of a warm meal. Despite a few delays, for some reason Jack from Manchester didn’t want our table getting food and supposedly gravy takes a LONG TIME to cook, the food was awesome and set everyone in a good mood for the party that night.

     We all took advantage of the pause in the rain to run back to our tents and get our pre-drink in for the party that night. Eager to out-do the night before, the majority of us took the “no alcohol going home” rule seriously, and Ryan set the mood with the revelation of his own homemade speakers to get the music playing. Gradually, we each donned our costume for the night, with me finding out the joy of how comfortable fish net leggings are! Although there was awkwardness as myself, Adam, JJ, Malin and Ailsa all went for the queen of hearts costume; I wouldn’t say I pulled it off the best out of everyone, but it was a close call. After some group bonding over a pre-drinks session of “I Have Never” we set off for the marquee looking like an advertisement for “don’t let your kids talk to strangers”. Within minutes of being in the party I had been thrown head over heel into the pool, and decided that as I was already wet it would make sense to join Meg in representing our illustrious uni in the pool games. Unfortunately, for the 2nd year running Greg managed to beat us in the name of JMU, but we took defeat graciously. I would love to describe what happened at the party that night but if anyone wasn’t aware I was so trashed that the majority of it would probably me made up. I do remember having a piggy back battle with Tom, Ruth and Spud in the pool, and there are photos that have me in the pool with Greg, who was wandering around with a pink flamingo tied round his neck, and I remember the night ending with a huge conga line to the song Love Train, but other than that specifics are quite difficult. One thing’s for sure, it was a fantastic night and the sort of night that proves why LUCC is such a good group to party with.

  

 SUNDAY – A TRIP TO THE WYE

      After deciding against repeating his drunken antics of the Friday night Dom was up bright and early to get everyone out of their tents to pack away, ready for our last day of paddling. Due to the high river levels washing out anything interesting on the Teifi the decision was made to journey north in search of something more exciting, namely the Upper Wye. Packing away tents was easier said than done as the strong winds nearly made more than one blow away while being unpegged. Without too much faff we got everything sorted and said a fond farewell to the campsite before climbing into the minibuses for the couple of hours it would take to the get-on. Surprisingly, our bus was most lively when Enrique Iglesias’ Hero came on the radio, as we all joined in for a rousing sing-a-long, but it became clear quickly that the DJ must have recently been going through a break up as the playlist resembled the sort of music you would listen to when crying yourself to sleep.

    We reached the get on without incident, and engaged in eating a quick lunch before getting stripped off in the road into our gear. Those of us who were still drunk from the night before, mainly me, enjoyed Ben’s music booming from the van and happily danced away until the heavens decided to open on us. Attempts at a sun dance were not very successful. To try and make the most of the light we got on as quickly as possible, with the water flowing slightly slower than the Teifi, but still at pace. A small set of waves around the first bend gave us a chance to shake the cobwebs from the night before out of heads before we set off confidently downstream.

    The confidence didn’t last too long though, as our group had our first bit of carnage of the weekend. A seemingly innocuous rapid took myself, Tabs and Sarah out at the same time, on the same rock, giving Graham and Greg some much needed work to do. After all the boats had been rescued and Greg had succeeded in crab walking Tabs and Sarah to the river bank we got back into our boats in time to watch the group behind us go to the far right and avoid the rock completely. Our good form of the first day paddling had taken a turn for the worse as we had several over the rest of the river, however, this is what trips are for and it’s great to give the experienced members practice in rescues! A boulder garden and a couple of small drops on the river gave everyone a great excitement rush, as well as giving the newer paddlers some good experience of upper grade 3 rapids. Ben Thwaites also selflessly taught the freshers a lesson of why a spraydeck is so important! After deciding it wasn’t worthwhile putting his spraydeck on for the sake of dropping down twenty meters to an eddy he happily set off downstream. Five minutes before I’d been talking to Graham and Greg about a rock just underneath the water by the eddy that had almost binned me, and watched with surprise as the same rock lifted Ben’s boat just enough to fill it with water, giving him his first ever swim with LUCC. Safe to say Ben was not a happy bunny!! With visibility becoming an issue, and after a large amount of swims over the last section of the river the decision was made to get off the river early. The get off produced a bit of drama of its own, as an overhanging tree root gave one of our freshers (Malin?) a scary experience, but fortunately superman JT was there to make sure things didn’t get nasty. This led to a tense get off for our group as JT and Kim stood in the water to make sure none of us went near the same spot. Unfortunately, Kim was also responsible at this point for saying the forbidden word, and did her forfeit in the river like a trooper.

    Once we were all of the river we happily got changed into our warm clothes, relieved at the thought that we wouldn’t be getting wet again that weekend. With it getting darker we got the stuff packed away as quickly as possible, and afterwards Dom gave us our Teifi in Wonderland tshirts that he had sensibly kept away from us while we were all getting muddy and horrible. A trip to mcdonalds on the way back was the perfect end to the trip, with everyone tucking into their hard-earned greasy meal after a good days kayaking. Unfortunately, there was still time to piss of staff members again as I could only watch as my large coke went sliding off my tray to explode on the floor, leading to the second refusal of the spillage is lickage rule. After filling up we made our way back to the minibuses to rest and contemplate on an amazing weekend. Thank you so much to everyone who came, it was probably my favourite trip that I’ve been on with the Canoe Club and I can’t wait to do it all again next year!!!!!

 Written by Social Sec Jak.

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